Ode to my ring, on being engaged, etc.
OK, so I'll admit it (for those of you who don't know me) - I'm a total pain in the ass.
See, Chris and I will have been dating for three years come August 4. From, oh, year one or so, I've been wishin' and hopin' and prayin'... But the months went by and by and I still had no ring on my finger. Even after we started talking about the future concretely, makin' plans and stuff, no ring. Sigh.
Eventually we had to Talk about it. You know, when is SOMETHING going to happen? I know and you know that someday we're gonna get hitched and make some babies, but when is that plan going to be OFFICIAL? The wedding is going to happen someday, but WHEN IS SOMEDAY?
So anyway, I knew it was coming... eventually. Then Patty, Chris's sister, got engaged last December, right before Christmas. She had met her now fiance a month after
Chris and I had met. And while they started out dating like normal people, getting together once or twice a week, Chris and I moved into near immediate cohabitation (although that wasn't official for a year or so; I got to pay rent every month for a house I never actually slept in!). You can imagine the emotion that accompanied my happiness for Patty for her news. You got it. "CHRIS: ???!!!" There were also tears, but I blame that on the fact that I was days away from getting a visit from Aunt Flo.
Where am I going with this? Well, after all this DISCUSSION OF SOMEDAY GETTING ENGAGED AND MARRIED, the fact that we were actually going to get engaged and married was no longer a surprise. So my ring? I picked it out.
I actually obsessed
over it for weeks, trying to find the perfect one for me. I had originally chosen a Tiffany ring, but they don't list prices there - you only get a "from" price - and the impression I get is that the prices on the website are not really reflective of what you're actually going to have to pay, from the $20k 1-carat rings I've read about. And I gather from lots of research that you pay at least 1/3rd more for the Tiffany name, for the same exact quality diamond and setting. Chris said he'd still get me that ring if I couldn't find another one, but hey, try. In retrospect, I think the ring I had chosen was a little... I dunno. Not me, really. Beautiful, but not me. I ended up finding my ring and falling in love with it and got Chris's approval that he thought it was a pretty ring too.
So anyway, on one hand, I wish I were a more patient type of person. Had I been able to have way more patience than I am capable of, maybe my engagement would've been a huge surprise. Instead of waiting for my ring,
I would have been surprised by it. Make sense? Here and there, I felt like I was being a nag to Chris. Particularly when I was PMSing, because it was around then that I actually got upset about it. I think some girls do just date and bite their tongue, even for years, to allow the guy to do it exactly when he wants. I don't think I have that in me, and I regret that a little bit.
On the OTHER hand, well, there's my ring. (The left hand, specifically.) AND OH MY GOD DO I FUCKING LOVE IT. Seriously, I was picking my own ring, and I knew that that was THE RING after looking at hundreds and thinking about it for hour upon hours. But I wasn't even expecting to love it as much as I do. I know Chris would've chosen me a classic solitaire setting, and I am sure it would have been beautiful, but I doubt that I could have loved it as much as I do this one. I keep turning different lights on in the house to watch it sparkle. I can't help but smile when I see it on my hand on the steering wheel in traffic. I can't stop telling Chris how much I love it.
So, the regret that I have about helping this whole engaging process along? It's gone now, because it really was time
, Chris is happy, I'm happy, and I have the most perfect engagement ring ever.
The diamond is just beautiful.. it has an ideal cut and is D color ("absolutely colorless" - the highest grade). It sparkles ridiculously. And the setting.. oh, the setting! I have a half-carat of little diamonds on the side, pave-style. The band they're set in is thin, clean... It's, like, simple but sparkly. And I think the size is perfect: 1.26 carats. I definitely wanted that respectable carat, but I didn't find it necessary to get (or, let's face it, ask for
, because I'm sure Chris would've balked at the idea of spending that much
on a rock for my finger) the doctor's-wife standard of two carats (it's a thing, the jewelers say, which is funny because that's what the doctors' wives told me at some party soon after Chris and I started dating: "Make sure you get two carats out of him!"). (Also, I'm sorry if these parentheses are getting confusing, but it's late and I don't want to figure out how to put all this in better order.) A huge ring is not particularly me
either. C'mon, my every-day earrings are a tiny pair of diamond hoops and my most beloved ring until I got this puppy was a $7 silver claddaugh ring I bought in Montana when I was 16. So anyway, it worked out: I just wanted a nice ring, and it turns out I got the perfect one for me. I keep thinking that if I got a two-carat ring, when I looked at it, I'd think, "Big!" Like I do when I see the big stones on the Housewives of Fort Lauderdale By Way of New Jersey around here. This one, though? This one makes me think, "Beautiful!" You know, something I'm proud of, but nothing ridiculous or over the top - just a beautiful
I will shut up about the ring eventually. I'd say give it a month or two. Or three. ;)
I guess it shouldn't be too much of a surprise how excited I am about this ring. I have always loved
the idea of being engaged, always loved to see engagement rings on other girls.. It's sweet, you know? You see the ring and you know she has someone out there that loves her enough that they want to MARRY her. Getting engaged seemed very special to me. And I am finally that girl. :)
I was worried before Chris popped the question, actually... I had an inkling he would be proposing on the 4th. I love the 4th of July, see. And we had my ring sitting in the garage for a good month waiting for the time that Chris deemed special enough for proposing. So I kinda figured. We were even bringing the Veuve Clicquot sitting in the fridge since the holidays. Because it wasn't a surprise, I was worried it wouldn't be an emotional moment. But when Chris came to the front of the boat and I realized he had not just fallen, but instead had gone down on one knee... Well, it was
special. After I said yes, FINE, we happily kissed a whole bunch. It was surprisingly AWESOME for it to be official. I got to tease Chris that he is now a FIANCE and HAS a FIANCEE and IS GOING TO BE STUCK WITH ME FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE! Officially. We're officially on the way to becoming husband and wife, which is the one step we have left before we start trying to make some beautiful little half-Asian, half-Scandinavian babies. :)!!!And
I finally got to pick a username on Facebook without it seeming like I was jumping the gun or would need to explain: staceytchen. :)
Now if I could just stop referring to Chris as my boyfriend, we'd be set.